Monday, October 17, 2011

"Mommy, find my heart"

"Mommy, find my heart", I heard my four year old say one afternoon.

     Now, to give you the full picture I should let you know that I was standing at the kitchen island deep in thought making out my grocery shopping list (which is no small feat for a family of eight and requires a significant amount of concentration).  My first thought was to say "Oh, there it is" with a half hearted tone and return to my very important grocery list (said with much sarcasm of course).

     I turn to see him holding up a toy stethoscope in his dimpled little fingers, looking up at me with his big blue eyes and the Lord spoke to me in that moment.

     "Allison", I heard him whisper to my heart, "find that little heart, gain that little heart, and keep all cost!".  I took a deep breath to help contain the tears that were welling up inside of me, pushed the grocery list aside, turned to this precious child who was asking for my love, accceptance, and attention and found his heart.  I couldn't help but smile, as I listened to his little heart beating, at the powerful message that he had just delivered without knowing it.

     The Lord had been speaking to me about gaining the hearts of my children for several weeks.  He first pricked my heart on the issue when I read a blog post by Josh Harris, where he re-posted (haha...this modern age) from a homeschooling father's blog.  Josh's blog is entitled "Homeschooling Blindspots" and is quite powerful.  Here is the link.
     You see, I too was homeshooled.  As I read this blog, I could relate as a child who had been homeschooled.  I felt myself saying "yep, yep, those are blindspots".  Then, I came to number nine in the list "Not Cultivating a Loving Relationship With Our Children" and BAM!...I was convicted.  Was I cultivating a loving relationship with my children?  I have to admit that I had never thought about it in those terms before.  I read it over and over again allowing it to really sink in.  I then emailed the list to my husband, who, amazingly enough, was also homeshooled.
     Since that day, the Lord has been sending this same message to me through  sermons, books, conversations with my husband and other dear friends, emails, blogs, and now...from the very mouth of one of the little blessings that He has entrusted to my care.  Here is one of the quotes that has really meant a great deal to me recently from The Resolution for Men, p. 105-106.

"People tend to embrace the teaching and beliefs of those who love them the most. And your children are no different. They are much more likely to accept the truth you teach if you deliver it to them within a loving, heart-to-heart relationship. Whoever has their heart has their ears. . . .

Dr. S.M. Davis wisely explains it like this: “The key ingredient in raising good children is to get their hearts early, keep their hearts, and be extremely vigilant not to lose your children’s hearts. If you do lose your child’s heart, then quickly  find out where and when you lost it, and put into action a plan to get their heart back no matter what it takes to do it. No matter how much time or trouble or money it takes to get back your child’s heart, you must decide ahead of time that you will be willing to pay the price.” . . . .

Despite this, fathers are notorious for doing things that anger their children and lose their hearts. Ephesians 6:4 says, “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.” Colossians 3:21 says, “Fathers, do not exasperate your children, so that they will not lose heart.” Before telling us to train and instruct our children, we are warned not to frustrate or embitter them. Why?

Because if we lose their hearts, we lose everything. They simply won’t listen to us. This is so important that if it is not heeded, fathering (and might I add...mothering too) will fail."

This message came by way of email from our former pastors in Virginia, Brad and Alyson Shedd, who have us on their mailing list.  How timely this message was!
 As my four year old and I took turns "finding each other's hearts" I silently prayed that the Lord would give me wisdom to recognize how to gain the hearts of each of my children and that He would help me to keep their hearts.  I believe that all of our children are saying to us "Mommy, find my heart!"




  1. Love it ... finding two little hearts and wrapping them in His love right along with you.

    And, I might add, you have the cutest picture on the top of your blog that I have ever seen.

    Be blessed bunches,

  2. So glad you're here, dear friend!

    You guys are doing such a great job of finding and keeping your children's hearts.

  3. Thanks Ladies! So blessed to have you both with me in this journey of life:)

  4. Thanks for the reminder that finding my childrens' hearts and tending to them takes time and so often I err on the side of the "quick response" instead of pausing to really listen, really speak with grace... Glad i found you through Sarah's blog hop today.

  5. Beyond beautiful. I needed to read this AGAIN today. Thank you for splashing me with mom size encouragement. And of course for joining me in splashing others. I hope to make this momma melody thing, encouraging other moms, a regular thing. (thinking Thursdays). What cha think?